Lillis place for rants and musing about life, universe and the whole rest. Mostly left, mostly sarcastic, sometimes in german, sometimes in Lilli-english.
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As you might see soon, english is not my mothertongue. And since english speaking people are used to others stumble around in their language, I hope I don't make too much of an idiot of myself here. So - my deepest apologies adressed to the English Language for not worshipping her better.
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Internet Ancient History Sourcebook
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Sonntag, März 07, 2004
Does Race matter?
If I were asked this question, I'd answer with a clear "hmmm....", because it depends.
Ernie linked to this interesting article at The California Aggie "Does race matter in love?". Funny to me, not written by a white person, but by an asian woman. Strange, I'm just used whities have a problem with such questions, but that might be because most people I know are white.
She is describing her living in a relationship with a white guy and people always seeing other motives than love in their relationship. Sure - as if we didn't know the stereotypes here, too. Since even the ugliest people (also meant characterwise ugly) can afford to order a wife from Asia or Russia via catalogue, the prejudices are spreading whenever you see a mixed couple.
I have experienced racially mixed relationships in different areas. One of my friends once married a turkish man for money so he could get his "Green Card" here. She divorced soon after, because she felst threatened by the guy's family.
Another friend married a man from Ghana because she fell in love with him but he left her the moment he had his Green Card status and is now living with a black woman in Cologne.
One friend of mine married a japanese woman after having had several japanese girlfriends, because he can not imagine having a relationship with anybody else than a japanese woman.
I was a short time together with a man whose parents were turkish, but since he was born and socialized here in Germany, I didn't feel any difference to another guys, even that he spoke turkish when he was angry.
Oh yeah - and the friend of mine who wanted to marry a Thai-woman so that she could stay here and after she had refused the noble offer, he became really pissed at her and acted like a racist nerd.
So, does race matter? I'd say not for the relationship. But different Culture does. I'd have many more problem to live with a German from a more rural area than with an integrated turkish male from Cologne. So if different race comes along with different socialization, there might occure problems, even the strongest love has hard to chew on, but see it global - in cities 50% of the marriages get a divorce, so your chance is never higher that 50:50.
(Btw - didn't I say, I'll never be divorced? I might become a widow, but won't have a divorce *g*)